


Dungeons and Voltrons

by MrMander



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition, Fantasy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-15
Updated: 2017-09-15
Packaged: 2018-12-30 06:55:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12103191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrMander/pseuds/MrMander
Summary: Pidges gets an old-school RPG running on the Castle's training deck, and Team Voltron takes a day off to roll some dice in a fantasy adventure.





	Dungeons and Voltrons

PS: I don't actually play Dungeons and Dragons. Don't message me about things I got wrong. I know. I don't care.

**Dungeons and Voltrons**

"Alright, raise your hand if you're here because you're actually interested."

Pidge adjusted her glasses as Lance and Coran raised their hands, and Hunk gave an awkward, noncommittal wave.

"And raise your hand if Lance dragged you here against your will?"

Allura, Shiro, and Keith raised their hands. Lance stepped out of line to glare at them.

"It's cool!"

"He's not wrong," Pidge said. "But if you're not interested you can go. It's alright."

It sounded vaguely as if Pidge really, really wanted them to stay. Whatever it was she'd put together, she wanted to show it off as much as possible. Not quite picking up on the human social cues, Allura pressed for more information.

"I'd like to at least know what it is," She asked. "Have you invented something, Pidge?"

"It's not so much 'invented', as combined two bits of already existing tech," Pidge began. Her natural inclination to blabber about technology took over. She gestured behind herself, to the expanse of the training holodeck.

"After I picked up that video game system in the space mall, I was...inspired, to try and find some a way to make human and Altean technology compatible. I've been tinkering for a while now, and I got it to work!"

Pidge reached into one of her pockets and pulled out the controller to the video game system she had bought. The wires had been removed and replaced with a large chunk of the blue-white metal distinctive to Altean technology. Pidge pressed the start button, and the training deck behind her came to life.

The graphics were a bit rough, seeing as the original Mercury Gameflux was outdated by a century or two, but running on Altean hologram technology it looked almost real. A forest of evergreen trees sprang up behind Pidge, swaying in a digital breeze as their leaves spread. With another push of a button, a strange looking beast appeared and began to wander around in the forest.

"I got the Killbot Phantasm program to run on the holodeck! I had to fill in most of the visuals with the pre-loaded Altean data on the holodeck, but all the underlying systems work just the same. It's one of those old-school cRPG's based on the Dungeons and Dragon's engine, so it took a while to get all the data uploaded. The character sheets, dice rolls, scenarios, all run on the holodeck's computers."

As Pidge finished talking, a strange sparkle set into Coran's eyes.

"Character sheets? Dice Rolls?" That sounds like-" At this point he restrained himself, and quite obviously reined in the excitement in his voice. "I think we might have had something like that on Altea. I only know because I might have overheard some nerds talking about it. Once."

"Oh yes, I think I remember that," Allura said. "Some of the castle stewards used to play it in a storage cabinet."

Shiro stepped forward and examined one of the nearby trees. He grabbed a branch in his hands and pulled it. He did not feel any tension, or the texture of the fir needles, but the tree responded to his touch.

"I'm surprised you got something so ancient to run on such advanced technology," Shiro said.

"All machinery uses the same basic principles, it's just a matter of efficiency," Pidge boasted. "I learned a lot about how to adapt human and Altean technology."

"That sounds pretty useful," Hunk said. "Can you work on a phone charger next? Mine ran out of battery right after that Gladiator fight and I was really close to beating the next level of Sweet Smash."

"Forget about Sweet Smash, man," Lance shouted. His pilot uniform had been overtaken by a holographic projection of medieval finery. "We can play Killbot Phantasm with holograms. This is the coolest thing I've ever seen!"

Keith took a look at Lance's holographic doublet and gave the Blue Paladin a long, quiet stare.

"It has been a while since we've been in the field," Shiro said. "This might make a good training exercise, something to keep us fresh."

"I don't think that's a good idea," Pidge said. "The game system has a lot of weird rules. It's fun as a game, but it's not a good combat simulator."

"I think you should give it a shot," Coran said, a little too quickly. "Your future battles will be filled with unique and unexpected situations. Having to play within the rules of this game might teach you something!"

A quick twang from a holographic lute made it clear which side Lance was on. Hunk had a smile on his face that said he was being quickly won over. Shiro thought for a moment. It had been quiet for several quintets, and the future looked just as peaceful -for now.

"Pidge, what kind of 'weird rules' does the game have?" He asked.

She hit her controller a few times and a holographic display came into view in front of Shiro's face. He held up his hand and scrolled through it. After Coran and Hunk pestered her, she summoned menus for them too. Coran scrolled through his at lightning speed, but his darting eyes made it clear he was absorbing every detail. He already seemed to be formulating plans in his head by the time the other finished reading the rules.

"Seems...interesting," Shiro said. He didn't know how he felt about leaving combat up to dice rolls, but it had its merits. "Seems like more of a tactical exercise than a physical one. I think this could be good for us."

"Well, if you guys are interested, I've got a scenario up and running," Pidge said. "It's not fully automated yet, though, so I'm going to need to be at the controls."

"That's alright," Coran snapped. "I'll stay on the floor, that'll keep it as a team of five, just like you're used to."

Allura nodded and folded her hands.

"And I'll keep watch with Pidge," She said. "Seeing how you all work together should help me advise you in the field."

With a few more button presses on her modified controller, Pidge summoned menus for each of the individual paladins. Keith began flicking through the hologram menu and selecting a few options, though his face made it clear he wasn't entirely on board. In contrast to his earlier performance, Coran took the longest to browse his menus, staring intensely at every option that appeared. He twirled one end of his red mustache as he considered every line of text.

Keith was the first to wrap up his selections. His uniform was covered by a holographic coating of simple chain mail armor, and a sword of light materialized in his hands. He gave the weightless blade a few practice swings. His stats and skill selections popped up in front of Pidge.

"Fighter, proficiency in sword," She noted. "Seems like you, Keith."

"I know my way around a sword," he said flatly. Lance strolled past his character sheet, strumming a tune on his holographic lute.

"It's a game, dude," he said. "You think I know how to play a lute?"

For emphasis, he removed his hands from the lute, and the tune continued playing. Lance shrugged, spun in a circle, and took up a place next to Hunk, advising him on a few of the finer details of the Killbot Phantasm character creation process.

The next menu dimmed, and Shiro's uniform transformed. Shimmering light took the shape of a plate mail tabard as a mace and shield appeared in his hands.

"Paladin. Hmm," Pidge said.

"It seemed appropriate," Shiro replied.

"And I'm a druid," Hunk said excitedly. A large staff appeared in his hands, which he spun enthusiastically. "And I can't do it yet, but just so you guys know, when I hit level two I'm totally going to turn into a Lion."

After a few more calculated button presses, Coran finished up his character creation. He was coated in a deep brown tunic with a stylish cap atop his head. A large longbow appeared in his hands.

"I'm a playing a Ranger with longbow proficiency," Coran said. He placed his fingers on his chin critically. "You can call me Dr'zzt R'Dl'y H'an'k Ta'ak'o, a proud and noble warrior of the Eylvyesh-"

"We're going to stick with Coran, I think," Lance said.

"It's a role playing game, I'm playing a role!" Coran protested. The Paladins stared silently at him.

Coran relented and tucked his bow behind his back awkwardly.

"Uh, shall we get started, Paladins?"

"Loading your first encounter," Pidge said. She mashed buttons on her makeshift controller and the forest shifted around them, showing a large dirt road.

"Alright, so you're a...gang of mercenaries, and after hearing tales of a massive bounty in the Kingdom of the Drow, you're on the road to their capitol."

"How far away are we?" Lance asked.

"A couple hours," Pidge said. "In game time, of course."

"I'll play us a song to get us there faster!" Lance declared. He proudly brandished his holographic lute.

"That's not how walking works," Keith said. Lance turned to him and pointed emphatically at his lute.

"It's magic," He protested. "I'm a bard, I can sing songs to make you deal more damage or go faster."

"The only way your singing would make me go faster is if I were running away from it," Keith said.

"While you're busy arguing, a Dire Bear attacks!" Pidge shouted.

A very large, six legged creature with a massive, four-mandibled mouth appeared amid the trees. It took a look around, spotted the party, and roared, opens it's many jaws wide, exposing a mouth and throat lined entirely with razor sharp teeth.

"That's not a bear!" Hunk shouted.

"I had to use some preloaded Altean models, cut me some slack," Pidge said defensively.

The "Dire Bear" reared up on at four of it's six legs and flexed powerful, clawed limbs towards the party.

"Alright, let's all roll initiative," Pidge continued. Holographic d20's appeared above every character's head. They spun rapidly in a blur before finally settling on numbers prominently disaplyed overhead. Keith, at seventeen, had the highest.

"Alright, Keith, you're up first."

With a character growl of aggression, Keith brandished his sword and ran at the multi-limbed creature. As he got close, Keith leaped into the air and swung. His blade cut a heavy arc across the chest of the Dire Bear, slashing the beast from shoulder to waist. Keith landed on the ground hard, bracing himself with one hand as he hit the ground.

A number "5" appeared above his head.

"The Dire Bear evades your attack," Pidge said.

"What?" He stood up and gestured towards the Dire Bear. "I nearly cut it in half, what are you talking about?"

The hologram Dire Bear was unmarked by Keith's dramatic blow. An HP meter above its head showed full.

"Killbot Phantasm is a game of strategy and chance, not action," Pidge explained. "You choose an action, and then let the dice decide the result of that action."

"That seems like a pretty bad combat simulator," Keith said.

"Every strategy has a risk of failure," Shiro said. "Learning to play around that risk is an invaluable skill in battle."

"Shiro's got it," Pidge said. "Next round?"

Keith was noticeably calmed by Shiro's more mature assessment of the seemingly unfair scenario, and he nodded.

"Yeah, I'm ready."

"I don't think you are, because next up is the Dire Bear," Pidge said mischievously. The large monstrosity reared up and flailed its claws as a hologram d20 spun above its head. The glowing dice settled on "17".

"That's gonna do it."

A seven-clawed hand swept at Keith, knocking him back across the hologram arena. Though Keith himself felt little pain, a large red number "8" appeared above him, and his floating health bar drained by a significant chunk.

"That's a nasty bear," Lance said. "Are you sure this a level one encounter, Pidge?"

"I can load up an awakened shrub if this is too much for you," Pidge said. Lance took obvious offense to this.

"Alright, who's up next?" Lance said indignantly.

"That's me," Hunk said. "I'm going to heal up Keith. Uh, healing Touch, that's a cantrip right?"

"Yup, and that will get him for, uhm," Pidge paused slightly as she consulted a hologram handbook. "Let's just say full, 8 damage isn't much."

With a slight harmonic tone, Hunk's staff glowed and Keith's health bar pinged back to full. Shiro was consulting his player handbook for guidance. He was still unfamiliar with all his abilities.

"Pidge, do I have to roll anything to use this 'Bulwark Stance' skill?"

"Nope, that's just a thing you do."

"Alright, I do that."

Pidge paused expectantly. Nothing happened.

"Can you shoot us some details on what that does, exactly?"

"Oh, right, uh, I take up a defensive stance, granting myself a bonus to...armor class, and imposing disadvantage on attacks against nearby allies."

"But not attacks against you," Pidge said. Shiro nodded.

A glowing blue sphere briefly shot out from Shiro as he took up his mace and shield. The blue light quickly faded, but a slight glow remained around Shiro's feet.

"This should keep the rest of you safe, but it only lasts a turn, so move quickly," Shiro advised.

"Alright, that makes it my turn," Lance said confidently. "And I'm going to play Song of Weariness. That slows the Bears movement speed and imposes a disadvantage on Dexterity saving throws!"

A song played, mostly from the room's audio system, but Lance moved his hands to mimic the act of playing. Up above on the command deck, Allura leaned over to Pidge.

"I don't know what any of these words mean," She said quietly.

"Read the handbook, Princess," Pidge advised. Coran was below, awkwardly shooting his bow at the Bear for not much damage.

"I'll get better at higher levels," he insisted. "I'm playing the long game!"

"This game's going to be pretty short if we don't get our act together!" Lance shouted.

Keith took his turn as the next round started. This time around he managed to succeed on his attack roll, mostly thanks to Lance's musical debuff. His damage roll, however, left much to be desired. The Dire Bear was still only missing a sliver of health.

As the Bear took it's turn, Shrio's Bulwark Stance showed it's worth. The beast turned it's attention towards the paladin, and swiped at him. Thanks to his impressively boosted AC, Shiro barely avoided taking damage from the attack. He wouldn't be so lucky next time around. Bulwark Stance was once per encounter.

"We need to get together and finish this," Shiro said. "Everyone, come to me. Unite up, and form Vo-"

He paused suddenly.

"Wait, no, we can't," he said awkwardly. "We can't do that. Sorry, force of habit."

"You can sit on my shoulders if you want," Hunk suggested.

"We may not be able to make a giant robot, but I bet we could combine some abilities," Lance suggested. "Hunk, you're a druid, you gotta have something we can use!"

"Uh, I focused on healing mostly," Hunk said. "The only thing I've got is this Blinding Flash spell, it makes people miss attacks."

"Hold on," Shiro said. He was consulting his own handbook for guidance. "Is it a disadvantage thing, or does it apply the 'Blind' status effect?"

"The status effect thingy."

"I've got a shield bash attack," he said. "It gives me a chance to stun enemies that already have a status effect like blind."

"I get an attack of opportunity on stunned enemies," Keith said.

"Same here," Coran added.

Shiro nodded affirmatively and swiped his hand to close his menu. He clenched his fist tight around the holographic mace.

"Alright, here's the plan," He said. "Hunk, I want you to use that blinding spell, and Lance, you give us that chance to reroll. I want the best possible chance of making the shield bash work."

"Got it, boss," Lance said. "I'll use the attack boost next round so Coran and Keith get the extra damage on their opportunity attacks!"

"Alright, let's do it!"

The round proceeded without further interruption. Lance and Hunk did their parts, while Shiro, Coran, and then Shiro focused on simple attack and defense. Once Shiro's next turn came around, he wasted no time going for the shield bash.

His first roll turned up a 4. Lance's song kicked in and turned that 4 into a 19. Shiro slammed his holo-shield into the creature's massive head, freezing it in place.

"Alright, pour it on!"

Lance's lute let out an upbeat tune, infusing fervent energy into all who heard it. A red aura surrounded all his teammates. Keith brandished his sword in anticipation of his turn. But first, Coran had his turn. He paused and began calculating all his character traits and skills to see what got him the best damage.

"Let's see, Focus Fire increases my odds of hitting and gets bonus damage, Multishot has twice the attack power but lower accuracy...I do have that big game hunter trait that deals bonus damage to larger creatures based on a strength differential..The Dire Bear only has two points of difference between Strength and Dex so that might not be too significant…maybe focus on..."

He began muttering to himself and twirling his moustache thoughtfully while the others stared at him expectantly.

"Coran, we're having a moment! Do something cool!"

"Give me a minute, I'm maximizing my effectiveness!"

Coran started nervously counting out numbers on his fingers and finally settled on a conclusion.

"Alright, Focus Fire! And I'm using Steady Aim to sacrifice my movement for the turn but gain bonus to attack!"

Coran notched an arrow and loosed it with dashing flair, striking the Dire Bear in its head. A large red seventeen flashed over the beast, removing a chunk of its hit points.

"Okay Keith, you're up!"

With another loud battlecry, Keith once again leaped into the fray, sword swinging. As holographic dice spun above his head, Keith swung his sword across the neck of the Dire Bear in a wide arc. He spun once in midair from the sheer force of the blow, then fell to the ground, landing gracefully as a cat.

This time, it stuck. Large red numbers bounced above the Dire Bears head, but were obscured by the fact that it's head was no longer attached. The holographic beast fell limp and dissolved entirely into a haze of light. Keith was surprised to find he'd actually enjoyed that. The party let out a jubilant cheer of victory.

"Alright, you've solved my bear puzzle," Pidge said proudly. "Now you better rest up. It's a long way to Drow territory."

**SEVERAL DICE ROLLS LATER….**

It was indeed a long road to Drow territory. They had a few more encounters with low-level creatures, enough to bounce them up to level two, as they wandered down the road. A few more encounters than they were supposed to have, even. Coran insisted on fighting every creature they happened to come across, hostile or not.

As the ranger sniped yet another innocent woodland creature, Hunk finally turned to stare at him.

"You got something against squirrels, Coran?"

"I have no idea what a squirrel is," he said jubilantly. "But whatever they are, they give experience!"

"One point," Pidge said for the umpteenth time. Coran's obsession with squeezing out every last bit of experience and damage was becoming tiring.

"Every point counts," He said. "I get a really neat ability at level three!"

"If you make it that far," Pidge said. 'Encounter time!"

A large horselike Altean creature popped into view, and a noble-looking princess loaded in shortly after.

"A princess of the Drow sits before you-"

Lance didn't wait for Pidge to finish talking before he stepped to the forefront.

""I roll to seduce-"

"Did I say princess?" Pidge said, interrupting her interruptor. "I meant Queen. An older, matronly queen."

The spritely young princess rapidly gained thirty years and the same amount of pounds. Lance shrunk back slightly.

"With a lot of armed guards."

A retinue of armored knights appeared to surround the suddenly quite unattractive queen. Lance regained his confidence.

"I roll to-"

"Lance!"

"What?" Lance objected. He looked over his shoulder at his party. "I want to introduce us. I have the highest charisma."

"Better be a good roll," Pidge said. "The lead knight comes forward, and shouts, 'You stand accused of poaching on the queens lands, a charge that carries twenty years in the dungeons! What say you?'"

The entire party turned to look at Coran. He shrugged sheepishly. The Knights brandished all of their weapons at the party, and the Queen sneered at them in obvious disgust. The odds were stacked against them.

"I'm making that charisma check," Lance said confidently.

"This oughta be good," Pidge said.

**ONE NATURAL TWENTY LATER…**

The party tried their hardest to ignore Lance's smug smile as they sat down as the honored guests of the Drow Kingdom's banquet. Hunk looked slightly disappointed by the bevy of entirely-holographic food laid out before him. It all looked too good.

The banquet as a whole was mostly a stalling measure while Pidge slightly rewrote this chapter of her campaign. She muttered angrily to herself about lucky rolls while she deleted the dungeon escape sequence and rebalanced the entire campaign arc.

"You seem to have as much trouble with those dice as the paladins do," Allura noted.

"Yeah, that's just what you have to deal with," Pidge said. "Is it this annoying yelling at us all the time?"

"When you're fighting with the Galra it's more scary than frustrating," Allura said. "It's actually quite a relief watching you fight enemies you can turn off."

Pidge finished up her campaign rewrite and got the party back in motion.

"It's so good that you've come, noble heroes," Pidge said, playing the part of the queen. "Our kingdom has been victimized by a most terrible dragon."

The queen went on to explain that her people, used to living underground, had not been prepared for aerial attacks. After being driven from their subterranean homes by swarms of beholders, their new kingdom had likewise been assaulted by airborne Gryphons and Chimera's, and now a mighty dragon. The normally reclusive Drow were even willing to work with surface dwellers to rid their country of the aerial plague.

The sun shone down on an open courtyard as the Queen finished her speech. She had barely finished talking before Lance stood and placed a hand to his chest in a firm salute.

"We'll kill the dragon for you, your majesty!"

Hunk grabbed him by the collar and pulled him down into his seat.

"We're level two, dude, we're going have to fight a lot more monsters," Hunk said.

"Of course. I've got a few encounters I want to run you through, a few dungeons to do. I'm not going to just throw a dragon at you," Pidge said.

"Aright," Lance said. 'We'll kill the dragon for you -eventually!"

The party agreed. They would challenge the dragon after some sensible preparation and practice.

"Okay, good, let's get started," Pidge said. There was a sly tone to her voice. "First things first: I'm throwing a dragon at you."

The holographic sky darkened as massive wings cut across the sky. Nearby trees in the courtyard bent in the sudden rush of air. Coran's little hat flew right off his head, and he snatched it back in a panic.

"Pidge!"

"Here's a helpful hint for the encounter," Pidge said. "Don't die!"

The dragon came into view, and much like the Dire Bear, was anything but a dragon. The Altean beast Pidge had used as a model had a large, barrel-like torso with six leathery wings and a pair of long, whip-like tails. In place of a head and neck, it merely had a large, circular mouth at one end of its barrel chest. Hunk gagged slightly as the "dragon" opened it's mouth and roared, showing off a ring of pointed teeth and a very, very slimy gut.

"Oh, that's a Spineridge Mountains Thunderdrum," Coran said. "They're actually quite harmless!"

"The dragon gets a surprise round," Pidge said.

In a burst of flame, Coran found himself slightly incinerated. A massive chunk of his healthbar disappeared instantaneously.

"That's a dragon now," Hunk said.

"Point taken," Coran said.

The Drow nobility began to panic and run around. Shiro took a look at the dragon, figured it was out of their league, and decided to play defense.

"Everyone protect the Queen and get the civilians out of here," He commanded. "And learn as much as you can about this dragon. We're going to need information later."

With a quick heal on Coran, Hunk went to work laying down some druidic protection. Shiro likewise had a bit of paladin protective ability, but Keith and Lance found themselves slightly less useful. Pidge took notice of this and decided to correct it.

"Oh, also, there's a couple dragonlings flying around too," Pidge said. A few, much smaller dragons appeared and started swarming around the courtyard. Coran's moustache twitched as he saw the smaller creatures flying around. He immediately drew his bow and started sniping dragonlings out of the air. Lance started to play his attack boosting song as Keith swatted dragonlings out of the sky.

Shiro placed a protective charm on the Queen and kept himself between the royal and the dragon as she made a retreat. The Dragon, apparently intent on barbecuing the queen, blasted him with a fireball. Shiro was handily roasted by the blast of fire, even after all his protective magic took effect. He looked to his team.

"Hunk, let's try the blind and shield bash!"

Hunk nodded and waited for his turn to roll around, then cast the spell. He rolled an eighteen, a pretty good roll by any measure -except when compared against the dragon's roll. The winged beasts spinning die settled on a nineteen, followed by a +11 resistance bonus. The dragon was entirely unaffected.

"Oh man, those are some big numbers,"

"Okay, back to defense," Shiro said stiffly. He hadn't been expecting such impressive rolls. "Can I get a heal next round?"

"I'm down to my last spell slot," Hunk said. "There's a lot of things on fire!"

"Why did you heal the NPC's?" Lance demanded.

"We're the good guys!"

"We're going to be the dead guys if we're not getting healed!" Keith shouted back.

A final dragonling plummeted to the ground with one of Coran's arrows in its chest. He flexed proudly and brandished his bow as a triumphant golden light shone down on him. He had finally finished farming experience from the dragonlings.

"Don't worry everyone," he shouted. "I just hit level three!"

"That's great, hopefully that extra arrow you can shoot really helps us out," Lance said.

"Watch and learn," Coran said. He pointed his bow at the dragon.

"I can fire two arrows with multishot," He said. "And now that I've learned advanced bow techniques, I can stack that with focus fire."

His arrow split into two, and then started to glow red.

"I've got the damage bonus from Lance's song, and the Strength/Dex modifier from my big game hunter trait!"

The red glow on Coran's arrows intensified.

"I haven't moved yet so I can get my steady aim bonus," Coran continued. "And since I haven't attacked the dragon, I can get an opening strike critical!"

Coran's arrows started to burn like fire as he listed more and more damage modifiers, laying out every possible modifier, stat boost, and skill he possibly could. After several minutes of listing numbers and traits, Coran's arrows were glowing bright enough to be blinding. The red light shot like a lightning bolt towards the dragon as he loosed a final, climactic arrow.

The arrow stuck in the dragon's hide, and everything froze for a moment. The numbers started to spin. Higher, higher, and fast and faster, they rolled out of the tens and into the hundreds. Like a casino game the numbers spun on top of one another, rotating at blinding speeds as they spun ever higher.

The spinning numbers came to a final halt as they displayed a bright red "256", numbers which began to flash in and out intermittently.

In a burst of static, the fantasy world evaporated. The dragon, the Drow, and all the parties items and equipment vanished in a blue haze of light. The only hologram left was a popup message declaring "YOU'RE WINNER!"

From above, Pidge let out a cry of anguished frustration.

"You can't just- No! There was a whole campaign, you couldn't have, agh! There were dungeons, you were supposed to fight a lich! You, you, you…."

She dropped her controller to the ground and slumped her shoulders. She let out a heavy resigned, sigh before throwing her hands up. She slowly walked out of the room, clearly dejected.

"You're winner," She said sadly. "Good job."

The party, now back in their paladin uniforms, looked to Coran. He was proudly tweaking the end of his mustache with one hand.

"It's all about the metagame," He said confidently.

"Good job, I guess," Keith said. He turned, put his hands in his pockets, and walked out the door of the training room.

"I was kinda looking forward to fighting some more monsters," Lance said.

"There's always the next campaign," Hunk said. He grabbed Lance by the shoulder and started leading him out the door. "I think next time around I want to roll a warlock."

"I think mage might work for me, I can see myself throwing some magic missiles around."

"Thanks for training with us, Coran, and good work," Shiro said. He put a firm hand on their navigators shoulder before he too left the room. That left Coran nearly alone. Allura had descended from the control room and was standing in front of him, eyeing him critically.

"You sure seemed to know a lot about that game," She said suspiciously.

Coran sighed and shrugged pitifully.

"Yes, I'll admit it," Coran said. "I was one of the nerds in the storage closet. Me and the other stewards used to spend hours playing Catacombs and Quiznaks. Every night we'd get together and explore the magical made-up realm of Palaguardia, rolling dice, arguing about monsters, and pretending to be things we weren't."

Allura clasped her hands in front of her chest and leaned towards Coran, her eyes sparkling with excitement.

"Will you teach me?"

Coran perked up.

"You -Princess, you want to play Catacombs and Quiznaks?"

"Yes! It looked like so much fun, and the strategies you used were so incredible! Please teach me how to play!"

Coran cracked a broad smile.

**ONE STORAGE CLOSET LATER…**

Coran, ever the traditionalist, had started Allura off old-school. Breaking into his long-hidden stash of character sheets and campaign documents, Coran had given Allura everything she needed to get started.

"I'll be playing Crushbone, a powerful barbarian with a mighty battle-axe!" The princess said enthusiastically.

"Excellent choice, barbarians an old favorite of mine," Coran said. He prepared his DM sheets carefully. "Now, since this will be a solo campaign-"

"Solo? But I'll be joined by a cunning wizard, a dashing rogue, pious cleric, and a bold fighter!"

"Oh, did you convince the Paladins to play?"

The paladins were too caught up in fancy holograms to appreciate Coran's classic pen and paper approach. Allura shook her head and gestured to the left of the table. There, standing amidst sheets of paper, were the four mice, dressed from ear to paw in tiny robes and miniscule armor. As Coran turned to look, the mice brandished tiny weapons and let out a fearsome squeak.

Coran blinked twice and stared intensely.

"That's the greatest thing I've ever seen."

**THE END**


End file.
